Sex After Pregnancy and Childbirth

Congratulations on the birth of your new baby! As you transition from pregnancy to parenthood, you will likely experience a new world of emotions, hurdles, and milestones. The relationship between you and your partner however, needs just as much attention and support as it had before.

Sex may not be something either of you are thinking about right now, but eventually that time will come. After all, it did play a role in your new mom title.

In reality, you partner will be ready before you are. For good reason, they didn’t go through the physical demands of pregnancy, labour, and childbirth. You may find yourself needing to tell your partner that you are not physically ready. You need to take the time to heal and it’s absolutely acceptable to do so. You do not need to feel guilty or embarrassed, your partner will understand.

In some cases, you may be physically healed but not be mentally ready. When I was pregnant, I was told to wait until your doctor gives you the “okay” at your 6-week postpartum check-up. I was very strict about following this rule. Then when I asked the doctor at my appointment, she said that I was able to as soon as I felt ready. Physically, I felt better before my 6-week check-up, but I needed that “go ahead” from the doctor to be mentally ready. 

Being emotionally ready is another feeling you may struggle with. You may have some extra skin or stretch marks that you never had before. Try your best to be proud of your post-baby body! You are beautiful, and that absolutely perfect baby in your arms, she made your body amazing! I promise you that your spouse isn’t concerned with anything you feel insecure about, and very likely thinks that you’re even sexier after having carried and birthed your precious baby. 

When the time finally comes, keep in mind that your partner does not want to hurt you. If anything hurts or feels uncomfortable, tell them. Things may feel different, you might be tense or nervous, you may be sensitive or feel a weird point of pressure. Everybody is different, so be gentle and remember to communicate with your partner as openly as you need to.